Reggie Love got a decent-sized write-up in the NYT yesterday. He’s a former two-sporter at Duke where he once got pissy-drunk at a frat party, passed out, and random dudes plopped their testicles on his forehead. When the pictures surfaced, he was kicked off the team, but was later reinstated by The Rat Coach K.
Moving on. A few years hence, Love is now Obama’s body man (think Charlie from The West Wing), which is sorta like being a 6’5 Swiss army knife. Watch Reggie telepathically intuit that the presumptive Democratic nominee needs a coat. See Reggie dab Obama’s food-stained tie with a Tide pen. Sharpies, stationery, protein bars, throat lozenges, water, tea, Advil, Tylenol, Purell and emergency Nicorette? Reggie on it.
For the balance of this interminable campaign, he has remained inches away from Obama on the trail — which gives him unique insight into Barry’s likes and dislikes.
Planters Trail Mix: Nuts, Seeds & Raisins
MET-Rx chocolate roasted peanut protein bars
Vegetables, especially broccoli and spinach
Handmade milk chocolates from Fran’s Chocolates in Seattle
Salt and vinegar potato chips
Asparagus (“if no other vegetables are available, he’ll eat it”)
Soft drinks (he prefers water)
*Of all the pressing issues raised during this campaign, it’s good to know that Barry gets it right on the subject of mayonnaise. The shit is vile, y’all. Just stop it.