Friday Random Ten: Hater’s Ball

In a country deeply divided along partisan, socioeconomic and racial lines, we should find time this weekend to focus on the things that keep us apart.

Health care reform. Abortion rights. Marriage equality. Whether or not our president is truly The Antichrist. Lady Gaga vs. Beyonce. Richard Hamilton. Drake vs. writer’s block. Should a grown man really be this excited to catch “Hot Tub Time Machine” this weekend?

You know, the important issues of our time.

Because if we’re going to be mad at each other, we might as well figure out why we’re giving each other the stink-eye.

With that mind, the PostBourgie family has come up with a list of diss tracks that even Buggin Out would approve of:

1. Scrap Metal by Cee Lo (Brokey)

2. Jack the Ripper by LL Cool J (Jamelle)

3. F*ck It (I Don’t Want you Back) by Eamon (Belleisa)

4. The Bridge is Over by Boogie Down Productions (Alisa)

5. The Bitch In Yoo by Common (R.A.B.)

6. Caught Out There by Kelis (Blackink)


Kelis – Caught Out There
Uploaded by ineptique. – See the latest featured music videos.

7. No Vaseline by Ice Cube (Jamelle)

8. I Hate Everything About You by Three Days Grace (Belleisa)

9. Second Round K.O. by Canibus (Alisa)

10. Eff Sisqo by Jack Benson (Brokey). Now far be it from me to question Brokey’s musical expertise, but there’s virtually no online evidence that this song exists. So feel free to dream up any and everything you think this particular cut might be about.

Of course, this is far from a comprehensive list. It was tough to leave off “Super Ugly” by Jay-Z, the final chapter of his vaunted beef with Nas. We ain’t talk about “Ether” either. Slb suggested “Get Money” by Junior Mafia since it was basically a diss track directed at Faith Evans.

And on and on we go. So feel free to make your own suggestions.

Because, heaven knows, there’s plenty of hate to go around.

Joel

Joel Anderson —blackink —  writes about sports, politics, crime, courts, and other issues far beyond his competence at BuzzFeed. He has worked at media outlets in Texas, Oklahoma, Louisiana and Atlanta and contributed to a number of publications, including The Root and The American Prospect, among many others.
  • Benjamin

    Eff Sisqo can be found here

  • That beef was done with “Ether.”

    Who shot ya.

    Mobb Deep “Burn” or “Drop a gem” or “Crawlin” Come to think of it, Mobb Deep is some trouble makin mfs.

    • R.A.B.

      Back at my home computer now, so it’s easier to type: Crawlin’ and Burn aren’t top-ten-anything material anywhere. Also, the Jay/Nas beef passed with ‘Blueprint 2’.

      • MikeCee

        Yea you may be right about Mobb Deep. After I wrote that I went back and listened to them again on u tube and they didn’t age well at all. You and I are going to have to agree to disagree on Blueprint though, IMO Jay is little more than the best marketing exec to bite 16 to 32 bars. He could have put out a record called “Nas Son” after that beef played out.

        • R.A.B.

          I don’t think Jay won the beef overall (well, maybe OVERALL, but not on points), but I will point out that so much of what Jay hits Nas with has the benefit of being true (except him dismissing It Was Written as a “meh” album, when that shit really was better than Reasonable Doubt), and that that isn’t true so much of everything Nas hit Jay with on Ether.

          • No truer words than “Taibo ho” have ever been spoken. 😀

            I get your point though. But its kinda like playing the dozens when we were kids. The last straw that always started the fight and killed the game was always the most unbelievable crazy, never to be believed ish. Who ever got mad first lost.

            • R.A.B.

              Haha, true. To me, “you no mustache havin’…” is THE line in that song.

  • R.A.B.

    I remember Crawlin. Good hook, good beat, lame track overall.

  • R.

    not a diss track, but one of my favorite disses comes from Comm’s I Used To Love H.E.R. where calls out Onyx and Das EFX.